>U Mom Knows Best: Signs It's Time to Get a Divorce: Knowing When to Walk Away

Monday, June 17, 2024

Signs It's Time to Get a Divorce: Knowing When to Walk Away

 To this day, many people, especially women, still see divorce as a taboo topic. Many people put off deciding when to get a divorce because they are afraid of losing their identity as a result of the process. On top of that, society still associates divorce with a “failed marriage”. Because of this, many people will stay in unhealthy and unhappy marriages. However, choosing to end a marriage that no longer brings you happiness, takes a toll on your mental health, and fails to meet all your needs is not a sign of failure or weakness, but rather of triumph in standing up for your own happiness and rights. Knowing when it’s time to get on your feet and walk away can be hard sometimes, so that’s why we are here - here are some big signs it’s time to get a divorce.


You’re Not Happy

 The most obvious sign it’s time to get a divorce is being unhappy constantly. Something is really wrong with your marriage if it always makes you sad, nervous, or depressed. Although every marriage goes through ups and downs, being unhappy all the time means that your marriage isn’t meeting your emotional needs. This can manifest in many ways: you lose interest in activities you once enjoyed, you constantly cry and feel hopeless, and you have a general fear about the future. When this unhappiness and misery follow you around like a shadow, you know it’s time to decide whether your marriage can be saved or if it’s doing more damage than good to you. 

You Feel Trapped

 You will know it’s time to walk away once you start feeling trapped or stuck in your marriage. This feeling can come from many factors: financial dependency, fear of being alone, or worries about social judgments. When you feel trapped, it can lead to a sense of helplessness and resignation, and staying in the marriage because of the obligation rather than your own desire can make you feel even more sad and angry. It’s important to know and recognize that staying in a marriage just because of fear is not healthy. If at any point you feel fear in your marriage life, searching for a divorce attorney near me in Salt Lake City is the right option. An attorney can help you inform yourself about your options and take all the necessary steps to get your independence and find happiness.

There Is No Intimacy

 A happy and healthy marriage needs emotional and physical intimacy. If a marriage lacks any of these two, a huge emotional distance is created between the partners. A lack of intimacy can show itself in different ways, for example, a lack of affection, less sexual activity, or an emotional distance where you no longer share your thoughts, dreams, and fears with your partner. All these can make you feel lonely and isolated, even when you are together. If you tried and failed to bring back the spark and reconnect on a deeper level, it is a huge sign that marriage no longer meets your physical and emotional needs and that it’s time to think about divorce. Once again, the constant lack of intimacy is a major red flag. 

You Can’t Communicate

 Any healthy relationship must have strong communication as its foundation. Once you can’t communicate, it will lead to misunderstandings, conflict, and emotional distance. If you and your partner can no longer have healthy and constructive communication, but instead every attempt to have a conversation turns into an argument and fight, it’s a sign that your marriage is in trouble. When people have a communication breakdown, they will not listen to each other, talk about their needs and emotions, and avoid any important conversations. Without honest and effective communication, it will become impossible to solve any conflict, and your marriage will become toxic. You can try to get help from a counselor or therapist to improve communication first, but if this effort fails, it is definitely time to consider divorce. 

Different Goals and Values

 Having different goals and values than your partner has can create big problems in marriage. People are unpredictable - their goals, dreams, and priorities can change as time goes on. If at any period you and your partner end up on different roads with conflicting goals and values, it can only lead to dissatisfaction and conflicts. For example, one partner wants to start a family and the other one wants to chase their career goals. This difference can create so many tensions and make it difficult for you to find a common language. If you and your partner have different goals and values and can’t agree on anything anymore, it can be a good sign that it’s time to end your marriage. 


Cheating

 This is probably the most painful reason to end your marriage, but it’s not so rare. Although some couples can rebuild their marriage and trust after an affair, for many couples it means the end of the marriage. If your partner has cheated on you, it’s time to walk away. Cheating often comes from deeper issues such as no intimacy, emotional disconnection, or some unsolved conflicts. The emotional wound from this betrayal of trust can remain for a long time and be very hard for you to heal, so if the cheating happens at any point in your marriage, it is time to consider divorce as the best path forward. 

Physical Abuse

 Physical abuse is a clear and important sign that it’s time to end the marriage. Any kind of physical violence, such as hitting, slapping, choking, or any other type can be considered abuse. Not only physically, but also your mental health will suffer if you stay in an abusive marriage - depression, anxiety, and PTSD are just some of the long-term consequences you will probably have. Remember that no one deserves to be treated this way, and that abuse must never be justified. If you realize that you’re in an abusive marriage, get help from people you trust: friends, family, or professional support services. There are also many other help options, such as hotlines, shelters, and counseling services that can help you. 

We know that it might be hard to make this decision, but once you recognize any of these mentioned signs, it’s time to pack yourself and walk away. You have been in a toxic marriage, so it’s time to put your mental and physical health first and make the right decision that will bring you a brighter future. Always remember that you’re not alone - so many people will be with you during and after divorce.

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